garbageship | WHO'S FLYING THIS THING?!

[It only takes Rey another day to reach the limit of what she can achieve on the droid with her current resources. She's got a list of parts she needs to (hopefully) get the droid working.

But she's hesitant to bring the list to Han. Her plan is for the best for everyone, but as her conversation with Kitty proved, not all of them are going to agree. She suspects (hopes?) that Han would disagree the most vehemently ... and while his disapproval wouldn't stop her, his refusal to buy the parts would certainly make it harder.

What she really needs is a way to make her own money. And that's a lot easier to ask Han about.

She finds him examining star charts she doesn't recognize (which isn't hard — it's not like she's seen a lot of them.)]

What are you looking at?

[Hey, look, the kid can talk. Sometimes. He's been thinking on their last conversation and all the nowhere it went, and trying to figure out how he can make his point. The thing is... Maybe he can't make his point. She's done all right so far. So if she's worried about him starting up... Well, probably eventually. But he's gonna try to hold off.]

Trying to figure out if there's anywhere worth going that won't get us killed.

[No big deal. He looks up, nods slightly to indicate he doesn't mind the interruption. What's up, Rey?]

[Rey can be a total chatterbox ... as long as you aren't trying to talk about feelings. Feelings are the fastest way to shut her down.

She perches on the edge of the table.]

How many of these planets have you been to?

These? None. Seems safer to go somewhere I never had a reputation.

[He gives her a tight smile. All things considered, there aren't that many of those.]

In general? I dunno. I never kept count.

If you've never been to any of these planets, how do you know which planets might be worth going to? [The computer from that Y-wing fighter she used to learn ... basically everything she knows ... didn't have the best starcharts, so her understanding of how to read them is rudimentary at best.

She hates not knowing things — so she's eager to be taught.]

[He shrugs.]

People talk. Spend enough time in ports and you'll meet people from just about every populated system. Or people who've been there, at least.

[And he's been at this a long time. Plus he's got some sense of the political situation-- he pays more attention to that now than he used to-- which is a concern with the Order after them. Sympathizers will be everywhere, but some systems are going to be more dangerous than others.]

But it'll be a while before we have to worry about it. Did you need something?

[She looked intent, walking over. He's just guessing.]

Oh. Right. [For a second, she had forgotten her purpose. She's strangely disappointed to be brought back to it; she would've liked to hear stories about the people he's talked to and the places he's heard of. Stories were as important as food and water in keeping her alive on Jakku.]

I wanted to get your advice. I know we're going to need money at some point to continue our journey [among other things] and I was wondering ... how do you get it?

[Putting it that way makes her sound like an idiot.] I mean, you get a job, obviously. [Six different languages and she still can't find the right way to phrase her question.] But, I mean, the only job I've ever had was scavenging for scrap metal and I was paid in bread rations. And obviously there are other jobs out there. So how do you get them? [Ugh she still sounds like a complete idiot. ]

[Well, there's one good reason to stick around.

The question takes him by surprise, mostly because the idea doesn't take him surprise. It's half of why he's looking at maps; finding a place to refuel will be easy enough, but a place that might have work they could handle without too much fuss is a little trickier. They need to stay under the radar, and it's probably better if they don't lean on the Republic more than they have to. It's the kind of thing Han used to be very good at, but the stakes are too high to be careless.]

Have you... [Yeah, he doesn't want to ask, but he's got to.] Did you talk to Ben about finding work?

[It's just, Chewbacca wouldn't have mentioned it and he hasn't talked to Kitty yet. He'd be surprised to learn she spoke with his son about anything, but if not, why is she bringing it up?]

[Rey looks at him, genuinely puzzled.]

Why would I talk to your son about finding work? [She's not looking for a career in mass murder.]

[Anyone can change their line of work. If you can go from being a drug-runner to a war hero you can go from a war hero to a smuggler. Those are both upward moves.

Never mind that, though. He shakes his head.]

Then why are you asking?

[Isn't it obvious?]

We're going to need money for parts. And fuel. And food. [Not to mention her own project.] I want to help.

Don't worry. We're not hard up yet.

[He's trying to be reassuring, not dismissive.]

That's part of why I want you all to learn to shoot. But you know, you'll have people looking for you.

I'd rather know what to do before we're hard up. Maybe avoid the "hard up" part altogether. [Everything else aside, she really likes this whole "three square meals" thing they have going on, and food that isn't just instant bread.]

[Of course she worries. She can't have had much stability on Jakku; he knows that sort of world well enough to guess how she must have been treated. The people in power further out toward the rim guard it jealously, and care little for the wellbeing of those they use for it.]

You have a plan in mind I oughta know about?

[Where did that question come from? Did Kitty tell him about their conversation?]

I just want to do my part.

[She won't lie if he asks her outright, but she's not going to jump at that vague invitation. Besides which, her wanting t to know how to make money isn't just for striking out on her own. Like she said, food and fuel and equipment cost money, and she wants to help make sure they always have plenty of all three.]

[Now and then his intuition pays off. Even a broken chronometer is right once a day.]

I can't send you out looking. There are gonna be spies pretty much anywhere we land, and they'll know your face.

[If it's any consolation, he and Chewie are even more easily identifiable.]

Isn't that true for all of us? Including the ship?

[Okay, Kitty is probably not as well known. And who knows if anyone knows Kylo Ren's actual face. But still. He can't expect her to just remain on the ship all the time except for occasional trips to empty moons.]

The ship is kind of a problem. We'll figure it out.

[Kitty has less of a record than anyone-- she's not even from this universe-- and he agrees with Ben that they won't risk publicizing his face too widely.]

Welcome to life with a bounty on your head.

[She crosses her arms and scowls.]

You managed to get work when you had a bounty on your head. You didn't just hide inside the ship.

Yeah, but I was pretty small time.

[So, congratulations? You're on your way to being a Jedi with all the attendant mortal terror and dangerous people wanting you dead or worse.]

Are you saying the ship doesn't keep you busy enough?

[He cracks a grin.]

I don't believe Han Solo was ever small time. I mean, you travel with Chewbacca. [Who the Wookie traders she learned their stories from made out to be some kind of godlike epic figure.

The brief moment of humor passes.]

I feel like I'm suffocating in here. [She loves the Falcon, loves being in space, but she's getting cabin fever and it's not the kind that can be treated with visits to isolated moons. She can happily go for months without talking to a single creature, but being cooped up with the same four people is a special kind of torture ... especially when she can't stand one of them.]

[That way of putting it is... Strange. Okay. Han is not used to feeling like the bit part in his own life. He and Chewie have always been equal partners in all their stupid endeavors, more or less. But she doesn't mean anything unkind, so he just lets it pass.]

You do get used to it. Eventually. [Even if all you ever wanted was off a planet it takes a while to adjust. There's a world of difference between seeing the sky and seeing nothing but sky. He's not unsympathetic. He's quiet a moment.]

Do you still want to go back to Jakku?

No. [It comes out vehemently, because she hates that stupid awful planet and the petty squalid life she lived there.

And yet, in the next moment, she feels an equally desperate desire to say Yes. At least she would have some room to breathe, space away from people and the complicated feelings she isn't able to process in the tightly confined ship. And despite what Maz told her, a part of her is still terrified that her family will go back to Jakku for her, but she won't be there. A small portion of her heart insists that, if Han came back for his son, then surely her mother will come back for her. If Han can overcome all the problems that drove him and his son apart, her mother can overcome whatever reasons she had to leave Rey behind.]

Maybe. I don't know.

[She knows the universe isn't fair, but she feels like, if she accepts being completely abandoned by her family while Kylo Ren the mass murderer gets to enjoy the love of his, she'll break.]

I don't think it's ever gonna be safe for you there.

[He says that as gently as he possibly can. It's not about keeping her or being rid of her, it's not about his worry that fear and anger will lead her down a bad path. Right now it's just a simple fact: they are always going to be watching that planet. He doesn't think there will be anyone showing up searching for her anyway, but it'd be insult to injury saying it. They're both aware of it.

What he can offer as an alternative feels inadequate. A family of sorts that isn't (unless it is. But that's a suspicion for another day). The problem is he gets why she doesn't want to stick that close to them, to Ben. Because in her mind he isn't Ben, and maybe he never will be.]

I want to help. You know that, right?

[She blinks back tears.]

I know.

[It would be easier if he didn't. She's used to dealing with cruelty and indifference; that was her life on Jakku. She didn't have to care about anybody because nobody cared about her.

But Han and the others do, and she wants so desperately to please them, to prove herself worthy of their regard so they don't leave her. She knows she's a disappointment, because she can't accept "Ben Solo." Any day now they'll give up on her.

She turns around so he can't see the tears she hastily wipes away. There's no point getting upset over the inevitable. She'll learn to live with it the way she's learned to live with everything else. As long as she can have even a small part in helping the Resistance destroy the First Order, her life won't be a waste.]

a day or so after her talk with Han

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probably contradicting something in canon but w/e

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